I originally created this blog about 5 years ago when I first moved to France to begin my professional soccer career. I started it as a way to keep my family and friends informed on happenings in my world. Clearly, it has been a while since my last post, but I wanted to share a bit about my recent events and let anyone who is reading this into my world once again, if only for a few minutes.
So thanks for being here and here goes!
On an island in the middle of the Mediterranean Sea. Wait, how did I get here?
My Body Made Me Do It
Injuries are no fun!! In the midst of completing my time in Liverpool and moving to and playing in Boston, I have had a dislocated collarbone, prolonged quad strain and a hairline fracture/ankle sprain. As is typically the case, injuries not only take a physical toll, but a mental one as well. I struggled developing my confidence back up when it seemed like one thing tended to lead to another. I tried to stay as positive as possible, but over time I stopped thinking about how much fun and joy soccer had given me and became so focused on how to recover, how not to get injured, how to get myself back fit, etc. My love for the game started to take a backseat and I began developing anger and resentment towards the sport I have devoted myself to. I would consider myself a positive and upbeat person. I do my best to lift others around me and let my actions speak louder. It is perhaps easier to be this way when your actions, or talents let’s say, can be on full display and allow you to contribute to the group. As soon as I lost this ability to perform I quickly felt as though I lost my ability to be truly myself.
Basically, going to soccer practice started to feel like a chore rather than a source of self-expression.
Waived at Boston
As someone who has always been picked first or second, been voted team MVP, won professional titles, it is a humbling experience to be told that you are no longer an asset to your team. That you have been fired… Help! Ego down!!
I was entering into a reality shared by numerous women who have unfortunately experienced how cutthroat the NWSL can be. The kicker, however, was how odd it felt to feel relieved afterwards. Perhaps it was a relief knowing I was going to have a physical and mental break.
But there I was, upset in my car, trying to process the reality of my situation. I was devastated for the young girl in me who formed this professional dream years ago, but so excited for the adult I had become in the process. What should I do next? Was I actually finished playing? My ankle throbbed and reminded me that for the moment I needed to keep myself planted because I wasn’t going anywhere just yet.
“It’s All About Who You Know” – Mom
A few weeks went by and I was physically and mentally feeling clearer. I even interviewed for a few real world jobs assuming my time as a footballer was at an end. But then I started to feel a bit of welcomed energy and excitement and thought if I had the opportunity I would love to finish my soccer career on my own terms. In the midst of figuring out a next move, I was contacted by Bill Reno, an American goalkeeper blogger who interviewed me a couple years ago. He graciously got me in touch with an agency. As per the usual with this sport, within about one to two weeks I had a pretty good idea I would be joining Apollon Ladies FC of Limassol, Cyprus to play in the 2017/18 Champions League. Not a bad gig!
So I find myself here on this island because circumstances have brought me here. I am not sure how long I will be here as my time is contingent on our results and progress in Champions League. With that in mind, I am excited to have the chance to explore Cyprus and be back in Europe where my journey as a professional footballer began five years ago. Funny the way the world works seemingly in full circles!
Most importantly! I am excited to be healthy again, to feel like a contributor, and to feel the love begin to grow for the game. Champions League Group Stage is being hosted here in Cyprus in 3 weeks and we have our sights set on advancing to the Round of 32!
I am grateful to have this opportunity and look forward to continuing my soccer journey and developing my story. 🙂
Thanks for reading.